Thursday, October 27, 2005

Hugh Jorgan Unavailable For Comment

How are there some people out there that have NO F*CKING sense of humor?!?!?!???

There's a house in the Minneapolis/St. Paul area that has decorated the yard for Halloween. They have the cobwebs, and skeletons, and a few tombstones. Sounds harmless right? Well, the names on the Tombstones are causing a stink with the neighbors, and now the mayor and city council are trying to get involved. ( story here )

Names on the tombstones include, but not limited to; Mike Hunt, Ben Dover, and Phil McCracken, I.P. Freely, and Hugh Jass.

A neighbor, Nancy Bowring, finds this unacceptable. "I find this offensive," she says, "It clearly crosses the line."

Clearly crosses the line!??!?!? WTF??!?! Didn't this lady ever crack a smile at a fart joke in her life once? Maybe even a knock-knock joke? What line does this cross? How in the fark is this unacceptable?? This really saltens my crockles. The mayor of Centerville (the suburb that the atrocities are displayed) said that she will be working with the city council on Tuesday to see if the city can forcibly remove the tombstones. City officials are trying to determine if this violates a city nuisance order. WTF????

I posted earlier about gov't officials spending their time on stupid sh*t, and this is an open and shut case. How does the mayor not tell this Nancy lady to STFU???? Ten residents have filed complaint with the city. GET A FREAKIN LIFE JAGBAGS.

I live RIGHT across the street from an elementary school. I just might have to go to the art store today and buy some cardboard grade poster board. Trust me, I've got a lot of names like this. When I worked for Verizon, we had to go to 'class' to learn the computer system. My buddy Jason ( the asst. manager at the time ) had to go with me. They made you use an offline system, and you'd enter in new "customers", and play with the settings etc.... so Jason and I spent most of the time coming up with / Googling good customer names.

Think the city of Tosa would get mad if I set up 10-15 tombstones in my yard? If my neighbors and city officials are anything like the humorless empty souls in Centerville, maybe I'll get on the news. I can understand someone having a lousy sense of humor, but absolutely NO sense of humor? Why even get out of bed? What a sad way to go through life.

Anyway, here's my list. Feel free to suggest some more of your own - cuz I KNOW some of you have the time to do this.

Emmerson Bigguns
Heywood Jablomi
Dixie Normus
Mike Hawk
Craven Moorhead
I.C. Weener
Sharon Peters
Hugh Jasperson
Betty Humpter
Phil Herrup
*Simpsons Ref* - Ivanna Hugnkis - Homer Sexual - Al Coholic
*Austin Powers* - Ivanna Humpalot
Lo Wang
Connie Linguis
Phil Laschio
Buster Hymen
Emmerson Bigguns ( my fav, worth repeating )


At 9:53 AM, Blogger Nick said...

Don't forget the best Austin Powers reference of all...

Alota Fagina

If the worst thing going on in their city is that... then they should be thankful, not pissed off. Lord love a duck.

At 11:06 AM, Anonymous Y D said...

Ahhhhhh......YES, I do think that the PC crazy, "we gotta make everyone feel good all the time" yahoos in the Tosa school system will indeed find fault with your "nasty"?? attempt at humor......why do I think this, you ask??.......have you not heard??.......are you ready for this??

The Tosa school system has decreed that children will not be allowed to wear scary costumes to their school Halloween parties this year......NO SACRY COSTUMES at Halloween !?!?!? SAY WHAT??? gets better - their definition of "scary" includes......
GHOST COSTUMES......they're afraid that one of the little kiddies might get upset or traumatized by one of these awful costumes.
I gotta find a saner (sic) place to live - somewhere where people can still laugh at themselves and others without someone taking offense; where people rely on their neighbors instead of the govment; where I can smoke my ceeeegars in public.........Chris' cabin is sounding better by the day.


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